I recently received notice that my neighbor has reported me to the condo association for SEVERAL noise violations. I got a letter outlining the complaints, as reported by him.
I thought it might be funny to send a response to the condo association/my neighbor, with a kind of explanation of each unfortunate event. I would list the complaint, and then my explanation afterwards. For example (this is actually one of the complaints):
4/26/06
Loud voices can be heard in my apartment 10:30 PM
I sincerely apologize for this particular violation; I distinctly remember this night! I had assumed that my girlfriend's and my intimate expressions of love for one another were not heard by others than ourselves! I promise that any further occasions of sexual congress will be kept to a low volume, out of respect for my neighbors and the bylaws of the condo association.
What do you guys think?
Noise violations
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5 comments:
I think maybe you meant were NOT heard by others than yourselves. :) Otherwise, an entertaining method of action, as long as you don't hope for friendly neighborly relationships and a positive image by the condo management. :)
I think you are on the right track here. I might suggest countering with noise concerns of your own regarding the neighbor. You may wish to complain about loud bowel movements that you have heard in the middle of the night. I would think these sounds would be more disconcerting than those from sexual congress.
Whoops! Thanks for the eagle eyes, Jess! The post has been corrected. Also, Joe: I think you are on the right track too. Perhaps combining our ideas will enable me to deliver the coup de grace.
Yes! I am glad we agree. We need to think more about this. Please be sure to share what you come up with.
So, the update. I wrote them a letter, finally mailed it today (better late than never, I figured), and then I get into my apartment and there is a note on the door saying that I missed the delivery of a certified letter. The last (and only) time I received certified mail, it was them telling me I had a noise complaint.
Hopefully, it's not that. But if it is, they will inevitably be charging me a fine for noise violations. And I, of course, will inevitably be telling them to prove I'm making noise. More to come!
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