Barry Bonds is a Jerk

I know that the majority of readers and contributors to this blog are not avid sports fans. However, I wanted to share some news going on in the baseball world and my feelings on it.

Within the next day or so, Barry Bonds will tie Babe Ruth for 2nd all time on the Home Run list. This is a huge accomplishment. It does not matter if you make it to this point with beer and hot dogs like Ruth did, with great class, as Hank Aaron did, who owns the record, or even with steroids, like Bonds. (I borrowed that reference from some posters people were holding up at a recent game). In any case, the fact remains that Barry Bonds is a jerk and a morally bankrupt human being. He is bad to the press, he is bad to his friends, as well as his family. He sold his soul a long time ago for this record and I think it is wrong. It is not like others before him haven't cheated, I am sure they have. However the others have done what they needed to do to remain in high regard with the public they entertain.

Without getting into anymore detail, here is my fantasy of how this record breaking day should unfold...

Barry Bonds at the plate... He swings... It's out of here!!!!

And here he comes rounding first, with both arms in the air and his teammates heading toward the field... But wait!!! Barry stumbles, he's down between first and second! I think he is having a stroke! Barry is twitching violently and now he is still. This doesn't look good.

Here come his teammates. It looks like they are attempting to pull his lifeless corpse around the bases... Around second... Around third... And Home!!! Barry has done it!

Wait, the umpires are convening... And Barry Bonds is Out!!! The umpires call interference for touching the corpse!

And so it ends... Barry Bonds is out and Dead on a long single.

If only it could be that beautiful.